by admin on January 15, 2012
Most women fantasize of the day they begin dating their perfect man, expecting to be swept off their feet. Men dream about finding a woman who they can share their life with. One who will care for them and help raise their children. Some expect to find their mate in College and can go as far as attending school to obtain the Mr. or Mrs. degree. The question that comes to my mind however is this. Is dating in college really a good idea?
Young adults trying to obtain a degree and further their education often get sidetracked their first year of college. Because of this, many do not finish their degree. College dating as well as other extracurricular activities is one of the main causes for this. Is it a better idea to create friendships with others while in college and focus on your studies and then date after Graduation or is dating in college the way to go? In my opinion it depends on what your looking for and your own goals in life.
Dating in college allows one to learn more about themselves and what they want in a relationship. It also helps you to grow and experience new things with a person who has similar interests. These experiences help you feel closer to that person and allows you also meet new people. You build friendships with others together that help bring you closer. The more you have in common and the more experiences you have together, the stronger your relationship will be.
Dating in college also has it’s down sides. Often, when you date someone for a period of time you come to a point where you realize whether or not the relationship will actually work. You know this by seeing if you both want the same things in life and if you are both going in the same direction. This shift in different directions causes tension in the relationship and often ends the relationship altogether.
Often times when two people grow apart they find that the life they built together has to be split apart. Many of the friendships that you have together feel they have to take sides and often dissipate. You also find yourself trying to figure out who you are now since much of your identity was wrapped up in the relationship. So is dating in college really a good idea? Yes and no depending on timing, where you are in life, and if you’re both on the same page. These factors all take a toll on one’s dating life.
Some of us are afraid that if we don’t date in college we may not meet that special someone or we don’t know other ways to meet people outside of school. Fortunately, for all of those singles there is the invention of the Internet and on-line dating sites. Many of these allow you to scope what is out there before paying for a subscription. These sites allow you to chat with other singles and find out if there is compatibility before you get too attached.
Speed dating is another way to quickly meet people and find out what you are looking for. It also helps you to realize what you are not looking for in a mate as well. Speed dating also helps you to meet new people and build acquaintances and friendships with others that can turn into a relationship later on. There are so many options for singles to meet other singles and that connection usually happens when you least expect it.
by admin on January 6, 2012
Women’s Rules for Men on a First Date
First dates are hard to come by, especially in these times. Here are some first date tips in order to land that first date kiss. Keep in mind this dating advice when on your first date- whether it is an online, casual, or single date. And keep in mind… First dates are like interviews. You often find out everything you need to know about that person within the first ten minutes.
The Dating Rules (How to Date Women)
What U Should Do
• Relax. Women can tell when a man is really nervous and this can either stress them out or turn them off.
• Be yourself. (Just keep out the fact that you have leftovers growing in your fridge from grade school)
• Listen to what she is saying. You
• Compliment her. Many men make the mistake that women are told they are beautiful and know it. This is not true. Many women are hardly ever told they are beautiful and struggle with insecurities because of this. Compliment her work ethic, her achievements, or whatever it is that you love about her.
• Hold the door open. Every woman loves to be treated like royalty in some ways.
• Ask her out correctly. Instead of asking her if she is free tomorrow night be more specific. If you have two tickets to the Steelers game on Sunday then ask her to join you.
• Over-communicate.
• Say what you mean. If you tell her you will call or text her later then do so. This just drives her crazy and gives her mixed messages. Don’t play the “I will call you in 3 days” game. We live in the new millennium. The 3-day rule went out in the 80’s.
• Have a plan. When you pick her up have an idea of what you want to do. Don’t ask her where she wants to eat or what she wants to do.
• Be chivalrous. Even though we are in this post-modern feminist world most women love to be treated well. Open the door for her. Pay the bill. Give her your jacket if it’s cold. Hold out your arm for her if she’s in heels and is walking on unstable ground (or just unstable herself)
• Most importantly… HAVE FUN!
What no to do
• Ask her out 9,047,598 times. Once is fine. If she wants to go out with you she will agree.
• Always tell the truth, but not all at once. She doesn’t need to know 30 seconds into your first date about your DUI in College.
• Have her call all of the shots. Women hate it when men don’t make any decisions.
• Push for sex on the first date. If she wants to have sex then she will let you know. The more you push the fast you will be walking back to your car… alone.
• Constantly look around the room
• Lead her on. Asking her out to coffee to get to know her better is a date in her mind. You may just be trying to get to know her to see if there’s potential but don’t brush off this encounter as a “hang out”.
• Rush into things. Going slow gives you both time to see what potential the relationship has.
• Talk about you ex in detail. You both have a past. It’s alright to discuss your past later on in your relationship but don’t go into detail. This only leads to jealousy and arguments.
Now, what about that first date kiss? Women HATE it when a man tries to play tonsil hockey on the first date. On the other hand, ending the night with a sweet kiss at her doorstep leaves her feeling on the top of the world and just about guarantees you that second date. Personally, my most memorable kiss was when he asked for permission. This can catch a woman off guard and enhance her mood.
Finding the right date can also be a challenge. Many men look for the right women in bars and clubs. These are the last places you should be looking. First, get off your couch and retire that beer gut to the gym. By getting active you feel better about yourself while meeting other women doing the same. Join a support group, or try on line dating. Just getting out of the house can do wonders to your self esteem and get you reacquainted with people around you.
On linedating is a whole different animal. The rules of how to on line date are simple. Be yourself. Don’t try to make yourself out to be something you’re not on line. Your date will be able to tell you are not the 6’11” body builder from Los Angeles. On line dating can be tricky. Join the dating site that works for you.